Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Spending Time with Human Beings (Part I)

When I spend time with you, what is my goal? Do I simply wish to spend time with you, or do I have some sort of ulterior motive? Here are some reasons we spend time with each other that are suspect:

I want to fix you. I want to be fixed. I want you to make decisions for me. I want to make your decisions. I want to control you. I want to be controlled. I want to fulfill some sort of deep emotional need and I’m trying to suck it out of you. I need you to validate my status or position. I don’t want to let you down. I don’t want you to dislike me.

Other reasons are suspect, but these are a few of the big ones. Relationships based on these reasons above tend to be unhealthy and dysfunctional.

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