I can identify with Stuart Smalley, a fictional character from Saturday Night Live during the 1990’s. He spent a lot of time trying to affirm himself in order to fight self-condemnation. I spend a lot of time trying to do the same thing. His famous line is, “I’m good enough, I’m smart enough, and doggone it, people like me.” This type of self-talk, however, doesn’t work given enough time, and I know this from experience. In the end, it is never enough. It is the opposite of the gospel which says that God and others must (as a beautiful act of grace) affirm us for the sake of our survival. It is others who have to tell us who we really are—God’s treasured ones. Our responsibility is to put ourselves in communities where this is regularly occurring.
Henri Nouwen states in “Life of the Beloved” that the greatest temptation we face in life is that of self-condemnation. Our natural tendency is to condemn ourselves because we are full of shame. We have no inherent ability to affirm ourselves. Therefore, trying to tell myself a whole bunch of affirming statements and expecting this to solve my problems is like a dog trying to train itself how to lay-down and roll-over on command. It just doesn’t happen. No dog can teach itself new tricks.
Hebrews 3:3 says, “13But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called Today, so that none of you may be hardened by sin's deceitfulness.”
For the sake of our survival, God has told us that we need to encourage one another daily. And, don’t go down this line of thinking which says “I’m okay now. I can go longer periods of time without affirmation because I feel more confident than I used to. God seems to indicate that once we have received affirmation from others that we will come to realize that we actually need it all the more.
Hebrews 10:24 says, “…let us encourage one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.”
Do you have people in your life who affirm you often? Do you have a group, community, or a few trusted friends you can go to where they know all your sin, immaturity, and irresponsibility, yet they tell you who you really are? God and others are the only ones who can tell us who we really are—God’s treasured ones, His beloved. Only He and they can give us words and actions that will transform our lives. Apart from them, we can do nothing to fight self-condemnation and shame. In turn, we also learn to affirm others, just as we have been affirmed.
Finding others who can affirm us is our first responsibility. Have you found them yet?
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Monday, May 4, 2009
Reckless Communion
I’m reckless when I take communion. I used to spend a lot of time trying to clear my mind or get my heart right with God in the moments before I took communion. I didn’t want to have sin in my mind while taking communion, or God forbid I should have some sort of unconfessed sin I couldn't remember. I stopped doing this, however, when I realized it was completely disobedient and destructive to the core.* I hope this essay helps you to feel free with God while taking communion and maybe to unwind some dangerous misinterpretations of scripture that I believe we often use to condemn ourselves, rather than to uplift us.
The moment I start analyzing things just before communion is the moment I have misunderstood grace and have plunged right back into performance-based thinking, opposing God's very rescue of us. I think this is supported by scripture in 1 Corinthians 11:25-26. It says, “25In the same way, after supper [Jesus] took the cup, saying, ‘This cup is the new covenant in my blood; do this, whenever you drink it, in remembrance of me.’ 26For whenever you eat this bread and drink this cup, you proclaim the Lord's death until he comes. 27Therefore, whoever eats the bread or drinks the cup of the Lord in an unworthy manner will be guilty of sinning against the body and blood of the Lord.” The moment I try to get my thoughts together or make sure I don’t have any sin in my mind I subtly deny the Lord’s death and his provision for me. I am proclaiming that He hasn’t died for me. I’m eating the bread and drinking the cup with a performance based mind-set which is, in my opinion, being done in an unworthy manner and is sinful, per the bold typed font above. I also perpetuate a cycle of control in my mind that is unhealthy, the very thing Christ has freed me from (more later in this essay).
The awesome thing is that even though taking communion in a performance-based mindset is sinful, even this sin of performance or pride has been completely settled by the blood of Christ. He’s rescued us without reservation, even when we drink the cup or eat the bread in an unworthy, performance-based manner. It’s seems ridiculous, but it’s true. All He requires is the mustard seed of faith. An entire tree of performance-based thinking (i.e. keeping the law) has been chopped down by Christ’s death.
There has been an increased pleasure I’ve been experiencing while taking communion each Sunday at church. Frankly, as a preface, I commit a lot of sin during sermons. I often find myself analyzing what the preacher is saying and pinning it up against what I’d say instead. Or, the sermon might point me to a particular situation in my life and I think “oh, if so-and-so could hear this then he or she would figure things out.” I have experienced more listening-to-the-sermon over analyzing-the-sermon lately; however, my pride is still often at its highest, smack in the middle of the sermon.
When communion comes, however, I don’t wait. Get it to me and get it to me as quickly as possible. I imagine Christ Himself trying to get to me as quickly as possible, too. I think about how wonderful it is--Christ’s desire to rescue me, even from the effects of the sin I’m right in the middle of in the moment. I remember he didn’t die for me grudgingly. On the contrary, His rescue is the core of our relationship. It is the very theme of his love for us. He isn’t like anyone we've ever met. He is the definition of Romance.
So, when that communion comes. I don’t wait. I exercise the obedience of trusting in God with my sin (Romans 1:5) and I take it recklessly. The more I know I am forgiven, loved, accepted, and cherished by God, the less grip sin has on me over time, anyways. This is actually the power of the gospel, over the law, the very thing I find myself falling into. Therefore, during communion, as a way to practice undersatnding grace, I let my heart and my mind be as open as possible to all of the sin and shame I bear in the moment and I don’t make any effort to do anything about it. I simply try to remain as transparent with God as possible, living in the light according to 1 John 1:5-10, which I believe can be cross-referenced with 1 Corinthians 11:28-32 which says, “28A man ought to examine himself before he eats of the bread and drinks of the cup. 29For anyone who eats and drinks without recognizing the body of the Lord eats and drinks judgment on himself.” Those of us who are obsessive turn these verses into something God never intended. We get wrapped up in making sure we have confessed all of our sin, but in reality we are trying to make sure we are following some sort of a rule to get all of our sin confessed and swept under the rug so that God doesn't see it any more. Frankly, examining ourselves is exposing our minds to who we really are, knowing we aren't condemned. The more we condemn ourselves, the more we fail to recognize the death of the one who rescued us in the first place. We drink unhealthy judgment on ourselves, and the source of that unhealthy judgment is our own hearts, not God. If it were not for the joy that I feel in His recue of my very own performance-based mindset in these moments, then I would be tempted to feel condemned for condemning myself through performance-based thinking. Do you see how neurotic this can get? But, let us remember 1 John 3:19-20 which says “19This then is how we know that we belong to the truth, and how we set our hearts at rest in his presence 20whenever our hearts condemn us. For God is greater than our hearts, and he knows everything.” This scripture is very helpful in helping me to act recklessly when taking communion. He is greater than our hearts which are often full of condemnation.
Finally, there is a great consequence for taking communion while trying to get sin or even shame out of our mind during the last moment. It isn’t the Lord’s desire to deliver this consequence, except to bring us back to a much more gentle understanding of grace. The consequence he delivers us into is our own unhealthiness. The higher our performance-based thinking (not just during communion) results in our spiritual, emotional, and psychological health deteriorating and we feel sick or like we have died. In some extreme cases, we might even die (i.e. too much stress turns into a heart attack, or we commit suicide—even these I believe are fully covered by grace for those who believe; it is that amazing). This mental deterioration is supported I believe by 1 Corinthians 11:30-31 which says, “30That is why many among you are weak and sick, and a number of you have fallen asleep. 31But if we judged ourselves, we would not come under judgment. 32When we are judged by the Lord, we are being disciplined so that we will not be condemned with the world.” The discipline God is speaking of here is not punishment. To disciple means to train or mentor a child or student into a better student. In this case, it means to bring the person back to life emotionally, spiritually, and psychologically. The language is explicit. It says we are disciplined so we will not be condemned by the world. The world is performance-based. The gospel is grace based. This is the discipline God speaks of. It feels counter-intuitive. Sometimes, years of putrid, performance-based thinking and acting out is what is needed to bring us around to letting go and allowing God to bathe us in the waters of grace or experiencing the waters of grace we are already bathing in. It isn’t a fun path, and I’m still on that path in many ways. You can pray not only for your own performance-based mindset, but mine, as well. I feel like I have an entire tree of performance-based thinking that needs to be knocked down, much less be pruned.
One type of antidote is a good dose of reckless communions. When it comes around next time, take it as quickly as possible. He is running towards you. Feel free to run towards Him. Don't think so much about it, except that He doesn't care at all about anything else, except coming to you. Leave all of your sin wide open before God without trying to cover it up before taking the bread and the cup. Just try. You might not feel like you got it right the first time, but that isn't really all that important. I don't know if getting it right is even the right language to use here. Just remember there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. He has set us free, free to take communion without reservation (Romans 8:1-2). Therefore, proclaim the Lord's death and take a chance on grace. He offers you His full protection.
_________________________________________
*At the top of this essay, I used the words "disobedient" and "destructive" to describe an overly analytical type of communion mentality. I want to clarify something. I don't mean that being contemplative or even convicted during communion is off base. There is a difference between conviction and condemnation. This essay was written against self-condemnation. I just believe most people operate under condemnation and don't really understand what healthy conviction is, in the first place. This comes from my own experience, even my own current experience. The nice thing is He can even take self-condemnation, which is transparent, and transform it into grace-based conviction, over time. And frankly, I am currently experiencing a contemplative mindset, but I'm enjoying this contemplation after taking the bread and cup rather than before. This is simply chronological. Feel free to contemplate and enjoy Christ's rescue of you before you take the bread and the cup, if you prefer. Enjoy it as much as possible!
The moment I start analyzing things just before communion is the moment I have misunderstood grace and have plunged right back into performance-based thinking, opposing God's very rescue of us. I think this is supported by scripture in 1 Corinthians 11:25-26. It says, “25In the same way, after supper [Jesus] took the cup, saying, ‘This cup is the new covenant in my blood; do this, whenever you drink it, in remembrance of me.’ 26For whenever you eat this bread and drink this cup, you proclaim the Lord's death until he comes. 27Therefore, whoever eats the bread or drinks the cup of the Lord in an unworthy manner will be guilty of sinning against the body and blood of the Lord.” The moment I try to get my thoughts together or make sure I don’t have any sin in my mind I subtly deny the Lord’s death and his provision for me. I am proclaiming that He hasn’t died for me. I’m eating the bread and drinking the cup with a performance based mind-set which is, in my opinion, being done in an unworthy manner and is sinful, per the bold typed font above. I also perpetuate a cycle of control in my mind that is unhealthy, the very thing Christ has freed me from (more later in this essay).
The awesome thing is that even though taking communion in a performance-based mindset is sinful, even this sin of performance or pride has been completely settled by the blood of Christ. He’s rescued us without reservation, even when we drink the cup or eat the bread in an unworthy, performance-based manner. It’s seems ridiculous, but it’s true. All He requires is the mustard seed of faith. An entire tree of performance-based thinking (i.e. keeping the law) has been chopped down by Christ’s death.
There has been an increased pleasure I’ve been experiencing while taking communion each Sunday at church. Frankly, as a preface, I commit a lot of sin during sermons. I often find myself analyzing what the preacher is saying and pinning it up against what I’d say instead. Or, the sermon might point me to a particular situation in my life and I think “oh, if so-and-so could hear this then he or she would figure things out.” I have experienced more listening-to-the-sermon over analyzing-the-sermon lately; however, my pride is still often at its highest, smack in the middle of the sermon.
When communion comes, however, I don’t wait. Get it to me and get it to me as quickly as possible. I imagine Christ Himself trying to get to me as quickly as possible, too. I think about how wonderful it is--Christ’s desire to rescue me, even from the effects of the sin I’m right in the middle of in the moment. I remember he didn’t die for me grudgingly. On the contrary, His rescue is the core of our relationship. It is the very theme of his love for us. He isn’t like anyone we've ever met. He is the definition of Romance.
So, when that communion comes. I don’t wait. I exercise the obedience of trusting in God with my sin (Romans 1:5) and I take it recklessly. The more I know I am forgiven, loved, accepted, and cherished by God, the less grip sin has on me over time, anyways. This is actually the power of the gospel, over the law, the very thing I find myself falling into. Therefore, during communion, as a way to practice undersatnding grace, I let my heart and my mind be as open as possible to all of the sin and shame I bear in the moment and I don’t make any effort to do anything about it. I simply try to remain as transparent with God as possible, living in the light according to 1 John 1:5-10, which I believe can be cross-referenced with 1 Corinthians 11:28-32 which says, “28A man ought to examine himself before he eats of the bread and drinks of the cup. 29For anyone who eats and drinks without recognizing the body of the Lord eats and drinks judgment on himself.” Those of us who are obsessive turn these verses into something God never intended. We get wrapped up in making sure we have confessed all of our sin, but in reality we are trying to make sure we are following some sort of a rule to get all of our sin confessed and swept under the rug so that God doesn't see it any more. Frankly, examining ourselves is exposing our minds to who we really are, knowing we aren't condemned. The more we condemn ourselves, the more we fail to recognize the death of the one who rescued us in the first place. We drink unhealthy judgment on ourselves, and the source of that unhealthy judgment is our own hearts, not God. If it were not for the joy that I feel in His recue of my very own performance-based mindset in these moments, then I would be tempted to feel condemned for condemning myself through performance-based thinking. Do you see how neurotic this can get? But, let us remember 1 John 3:19-20 which says “19This then is how we know that we belong to the truth, and how we set our hearts at rest in his presence 20whenever our hearts condemn us. For God is greater than our hearts, and he knows everything.” This scripture is very helpful in helping me to act recklessly when taking communion. He is greater than our hearts which are often full of condemnation.
Finally, there is a great consequence for taking communion while trying to get sin or even shame out of our mind during the last moment. It isn’t the Lord’s desire to deliver this consequence, except to bring us back to a much more gentle understanding of grace. The consequence he delivers us into is our own unhealthiness. The higher our performance-based thinking (not just during communion) results in our spiritual, emotional, and psychological health deteriorating and we feel sick or like we have died. In some extreme cases, we might even die (i.e. too much stress turns into a heart attack, or we commit suicide—even these I believe are fully covered by grace for those who believe; it is that amazing). This mental deterioration is supported I believe by 1 Corinthians 11:30-31 which says, “30That is why many among you are weak and sick, and a number of you have fallen asleep. 31But if we judged ourselves, we would not come under judgment. 32When we are judged by the Lord, we are being disciplined so that we will not be condemned with the world.” The discipline God is speaking of here is not punishment. To disciple means to train or mentor a child or student into a better student. In this case, it means to bring the person back to life emotionally, spiritually, and psychologically. The language is explicit. It says we are disciplined so we will not be condemned by the world. The world is performance-based. The gospel is grace based. This is the discipline God speaks of. It feels counter-intuitive. Sometimes, years of putrid, performance-based thinking and acting out is what is needed to bring us around to letting go and allowing God to bathe us in the waters of grace or experiencing the waters of grace we are already bathing in. It isn’t a fun path, and I’m still on that path in many ways. You can pray not only for your own performance-based mindset, but mine, as well. I feel like I have an entire tree of performance-based thinking that needs to be knocked down, much less be pruned.
One type of antidote is a good dose of reckless communions. When it comes around next time, take it as quickly as possible. He is running towards you. Feel free to run towards Him. Don't think so much about it, except that He doesn't care at all about anything else, except coming to you. Leave all of your sin wide open before God without trying to cover it up before taking the bread and the cup. Just try. You might not feel like you got it right the first time, but that isn't really all that important. I don't know if getting it right is even the right language to use here. Just remember there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. He has set us free, free to take communion without reservation (Romans 8:1-2). Therefore, proclaim the Lord's death and take a chance on grace. He offers you His full protection.
_________________________________________
*At the top of this essay, I used the words "disobedient" and "destructive" to describe an overly analytical type of communion mentality. I want to clarify something. I don't mean that being contemplative or even convicted during communion is off base. There is a difference between conviction and condemnation. This essay was written against self-condemnation. I just believe most people operate under condemnation and don't really understand what healthy conviction is, in the first place. This comes from my own experience, even my own current experience. The nice thing is He can even take self-condemnation, which is transparent, and transform it into grace-based conviction, over time. And frankly, I am currently experiencing a contemplative mindset, but I'm enjoying this contemplation after taking the bread and cup rather than before. This is simply chronological. Feel free to contemplate and enjoy Christ's rescue of you before you take the bread and the cup, if you prefer. Enjoy it as much as possible!
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Flat Tires and Impending Doom
My friends and I drove through Armarillo, Texas last week on our way to Tulsa. After a heavy breakfast at Cracker Barrel, a concerned woman rapped on our window in the parking lot, just as we were about to drive away. Our driver side, rear tire had lost most of its air during breakfast. My roommate drove us to a Shell gas station. After filling up the tire, he determined we had a leak in the valve stem. Another friend got on his GPS and found a Firestone nearby. We inched over to the shop only to find it unstaffed for the lunch hour. The remaining employee thought about it for a moment, then decided to fix the valve stem on his own time. He did the task in a short 20 minutes and the bill was only $12.50. He would’a been great in a nascar pit stop. Within 30 minutes of the original diagnosis, we were back on the racetrack.... I mean we were on the freeway, and on our way to Tulsa.
The woman who knocked on the door to warn us of our near-flat tire could have chosen to ignore the situation, hoping we’d discover the problem on our own, before it was too late. Likewise, in our day-to-day lives there are times when we can warn someone quickly that what they’re doing might end up hurting them or others in the long run. In return, shouldn’t we desire to be lovingly warned (without condemnation) of our own self-destructive behaviors before it was too late?
Unfortunately, there’s a variety of reasons we don’t warn each other or receive each others’ warnings very well. We’re afraid. We’re embarrassed. We’re defensive. We don’t know what to say. It’s amazing because we can say, “Yes, please tell me that my tire is flat on the highway, but don’t tell me that I’m not being emotionally attentive to you when we’re together. Don’t tell me I’m treating my employees or co-workers unequally. Don’t tell me I often say yes to your requests, but that I don’t follow through on them very often.”
Failure to warn someone about something small, like a broken valve stem on their tire can lead to a quick and disastrous outcome within minutes. Failure to warn someone of their dysfunctional habits can lead to a slow and disastrous outcome that might take place over years or even decades. Let’s remember that love never tries to force anyone to do anything, but that it warns others about the things that are hurting us, those around them, or even themselves.
The woman who knocked on the door to warn us of our near-flat tire could have chosen to ignore the situation, hoping we’d discover the problem on our own, before it was too late. Likewise, in our day-to-day lives there are times when we can warn someone quickly that what they’re doing might end up hurting them or others in the long run. In return, shouldn’t we desire to be lovingly warned (without condemnation) of our own self-destructive behaviors before it was too late?
Unfortunately, there’s a variety of reasons we don’t warn each other or receive each others’ warnings very well. We’re afraid. We’re embarrassed. We’re defensive. We don’t know what to say. It’s amazing because we can say, “Yes, please tell me that my tire is flat on the highway, but don’t tell me that I’m not being emotionally attentive to you when we’re together. Don’t tell me I’m treating my employees or co-workers unequally. Don’t tell me I often say yes to your requests, but that I don’t follow through on them very often.”
Failure to warn someone about something small, like a broken valve stem on their tire can lead to a quick and disastrous outcome within minutes. Failure to warn someone of their dysfunctional habits can lead to a slow and disastrous outcome that might take place over years or even decades. Let’s remember that love never tries to force anyone to do anything, but that it warns others about the things that are hurting us, those around them, or even themselves.
Monday, March 23, 2009
Healthy Conflict is the Entry Point to New Life
This blog entry is a follow-up to the previous one called Healthy Relationships Kill Us in the End. I recommend you read that one first.
Conflict is often the entry point into healthy relationships. The main thing that prevents positive, healthy relationships is a failure to deal with the conflict. And, I know this might sound way out there, but the only way to get reconnected to the person we love or work with is to enter back into the relationship through the thing we fear most. We’ll have to re-enter the relationship through the very conflict we are avoiding.* In the end, however, if we deal with it, we will often feel like we’ve become more alive and more connected to the other person. In fact, I’ve noticed that some of my most intimate experiences with others has been through confronting one another and conversations about our conflicts.
Let’s remember that by lovingly confronting one another on our sin, we might initially feel like we’re dying, but in the end, we will help each other be raised to new life.
“For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will save it.” ~Jesus in Matthew 9:24
______________________________________
*For more help with how to confront one another in a healthy way, please read a book called Face to Face by Cloud and Townsend.
Conflict is often the entry point into healthy relationships. The main thing that prevents positive, healthy relationships is a failure to deal with the conflict. And, I know this might sound way out there, but the only way to get reconnected to the person we love or work with is to enter back into the relationship through the thing we fear most. We’ll have to re-enter the relationship through the very conflict we are avoiding.* In the end, however, if we deal with it, we will often feel like we’ve become more alive and more connected to the other person. In fact, I’ve noticed that some of my most intimate experiences with others has been through confronting one another and conversations about our conflicts.
Let’s remember that by lovingly confronting one another on our sin, we might initially feel like we’re dying, but in the end, we will help each other be raised to new life.
“For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will save it.” ~Jesus in Matthew 9:24
______________________________________
*For more help with how to confront one another in a healthy way, please read a book called Face to Face by Cloud and Townsend.
Healthy Relationships Kill Us in the End
Living in grace and truth with one another requires transparency, vulnerability, and loving confrontation. Without them, real sin cannot be truly forgiven, real weaknesses cannot be truly strengthened or supported, and non-moral preferences cannot be recognized for what they are either.
Many of us don’t lovingly confront one another because we incorrectly believe that we fear hurting those around us. The truth is that most of the time, we fear the repercussions that we might face. We fear rejection. We fear ridicule. We fear the other person will ignore us or become defensive. We fear being wrong. These things feel like death to us.
Many of us don’t lovingly confront one another because we incorrectly believe that we fear hurting those around us. The truth is that most of the time, we fear the repercussions that we might face. We fear rejection. We fear ridicule. We fear the other person will ignore us or become defensive. We fear being wrong. These things feel like death to us.
As I have become more relationally healthy over the past couple years, I've tried to practice the act of communicating prior to deciding if I'm right or wrong. I simply put it out on the table. My feelings aren't right or wrong, so I often start there. Just get it out on the table and see what happens. Often it seems more important to be known than to be right.*
Let’s remember that in grace and truth, we do not overlook sin, weaknesses, or non-moral preferences. We deal with it. We deal with it in the most loving way. We die for one another.
"If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.” ~Jesus in Matthew 9:23
Let’s remember that in grace and truth, we do not overlook sin, weaknesses, or non-moral preferences. We deal with it. We deal with it in the most loving way. We die for one another.
"If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.” ~Jesus in Matthew 9:23
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*A good book to help husbands and wives deal with this issue is called "Love and Respect".
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Jesus was Probably a Resentful, Insane, and Blubbering Idiot
Jesus was probably a resentful, insane, and blubbering idiot. The title should scare you, but not for the reason you think. Ironically, it should also bathe you in deep feelings of affirmation and love. Deep love that maybe you’ve never explored before.
Picture the following. I’m sure you’ve seen it before. A homeless drug user, with mental health issues, is walking along the sidewalk talking to himself. No, he’s not talking to himself. He’s talking to someone you can’t see. He’s yelling at him. In fact, he’s fuming and spouting off a bizarre array of cuss words, unintelligible sentences, and repetitive phrases. His skin is red, his hair is uncombed, and his winter jacket contradicts the summer weather.
You might try to talk to him if you were an unusually caring person. It’s of no use. You speak to him, he acknowledges you for a moment, but soon he boomerangs back into his hurricane of resentments and recycled arguments. He’s still arguing with his father who abandoned him 35 years ago.
This picture probably gives us a good glimpse of the rotten, resentful heart and mind of Jesus. It was full of garbage--years of pent up anger and murderous thoughts towards a random variety of family, friends, the government, the system, and many people he didn’t even know. If you’d have met him, you wouldn’t have even sensed he had a soul, but that it had been destroyed, disintegrated, had rotten away, or at least that it was lost somewhere deep down inside of him in a way that no one could ever rejuvinate.
This is my view of what Jesus might have been like during his three days in hell. These are the three days between his death and resurrection when Jesus (God the Son) died on the cross, bore our real sin, and was cast out of his father’s presence (God the Father). God had damned him. Jesus cried out on the cross, “My God, why have you deserted me?” (Matthew 27:46)
And that was it. Complete separation from his own father. His own father abandoned him and left him to his own selfish insanity. No, Jesus had done this himself. Actually, I'm not sure how it works, but as Jesus died, he turned his back on God and walked away. After being separated from His dear, loving father he might have begun to grieve. Shortly thereafter, he might have flip-flopped and hurled insults at God and began an incessant series of arguments with all of the people in his life who had wronged him or looked at him strangely.
Then came deep loneliness, fear, anxiety, and all in one moment he’s back into a fury of disillusions and antagonisms towards his father (God the Father) once again. He might have said something like this, “How did I ever let You convince Me to do this? How dare you Father have manipulated Me into carrying their burdens, their sin, their very lives on my back! They’re horrible, disgusting pieces of trash. They’re unworthy of any help whatsoever and deserve this place more than me. How did I ever let You convince Me to do this for them! You dare call yourself God! You’re like the devil himself. You’re manipulative. You’re detestable. You are a coward. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. How could have I been so stupid!? How could you be so evil? How could you betray me like this Father!? Raise me back to life in three days!? Are you kidding me? Oh God, how could I have been so stupid!? You tricked me! You tricked me! You tricked me! You are no longer my father. Never ever ever ever ever again will I ever call You my father. I will never, ever let myself ever trust you again. This relationship is over! I will never ever ever ever talk to you again. Ever.”
In order to get the full grasp of the judgement Jesus endured for us, I’m speculating that Jesus Himself might have literally lost sight of why He had even died for us or even that it was going to work at all. Of course, I’m only speculating and I don’t have a clue as to the real intensity, but I think He may have broken down into a full-blown case of rage towards His Father. He might have even thought God tricked Him into being cast into hell with no hope of ever being restored. He probably had lost all hope. This is the full weight of judgement.
Now you might be thinking to yourself, "No matter how bad a place hell might be, I'd never turn into anything so crazy as this portrait you are making Jesus out to be during His time away from God the Father." The reality is that we've already been there to a certain extent in our limited lifetime today. Think about someone you've had a mental argument with and it has lasted for days. You've been surprised at yourself for having let it go on so long, but you can't seem to get out of it. It could be as simple as someone cutting you off on the freeway or as hurtful as someone cheating on you. Either way, you retaliate, either in real life or in your own mind. You want to isolate rather than resolve the issue or you get offensive and attack the other person. Hell is an eternal extension of this sort of hell we experience here on earth, minus the presence of God, minus the presence of any loving human beings, plus the addition of it going on for thousands, millions, and billions of years into forever. In fact, it could be you're still arguing with the same driver that cut you off and that was a couple million years ago. When Jesus was rejected by God the Father, he might have went off on millions and billions of all of our arguments, resentments, and furies at at one time. Of course, I can only speculate and I'm treading down uncharted waters, but if I'm theologically incorrect, then I bank on the very hope and rescue that I'm proposing.
Here's the silver lining. On the third day, when He might have been least expecting it, when He was at his most destitute and cynical moment, when He had absolutely no hope, the Father did raise Him from the dead! It was glorious! Having been raised from the pit of hell, everything returned. All the reasons He had trusted the Father. All the reasons He wanted to do it for us. All the reasons He and the Father went in on the deal in the first place.
The silver lining is that Jesus rescued us from this pit of hell. This could be us. This should be us. This is naturally what we gravitate towards--resentment, bitterness, isolation, and separation from God. This is what it is like for those who say “I have no need to be rescued.” In the end, He won’t deny our choice and this will be His conscious choice to both condemn and affirm our personhood all at the same time. He’ll simply let us go our own way. We either let Him rescue us, or we resist any notion of rescue forever.
For those who say, “Yes God, please rescue me!” these people will feel bathed in the deep love and affirmation He has for us. He went into this whole thing knowing full well that He’d turn out to be a shriveled up little piece of junk, wound up in a fetal position, uttering hopeless insults towards the Father or anyone who could hear Him. He knew He’d loose all sense of reality, and this is what He wanted to do for us. This is the silver lining. He’s a Romantic at heart. He’s done it willingly.
Now, there’s a tendency for those who follow Him to have a belief like this, “Oh, yes, I understand He died for my sins and that’s why I need to try my best to keep my act together and be a really good kind of Christian now that I know what He’s really done for me. I better straighten things out. I’m gonna start reading my Bible, I’m gonna start praying and doing devotions every day. I’m gonna prove I really love Him. I’m gonna do this thing now!” This is a bunch of hogwash. I’d use worse terms to describe how awful it is to believe in such a way. It’s a horrible way for a follower of Jesus to live--to deny His rescue which had no regrets.
The opposite of this gotta-make-up-for-what-He’s-done mentality is what’s true. He’s the Great Rescuer. He’s done it willingly. He’s done it without any reservation. When we see the way in which He’s rescued us without any reservations for having done so, we can finally begin to rest.
Let’s remember that this whole non-fiction story of love and romance is about His character, about His love, and about the great lengths that He went to in order to enjoy us forever, so that we could enjoy Him forever. He probably turned into a resentful, insane, and blubbering idiot so that we didn't have to become resentful, insane, and blubbering idiots for eternity. For such a love as this, we should never hesitate.
(I want to thank Tim Keller for some of the theological underpinnings to this blog entry. His article called "The Importance of Hell" can be found at http://www.redeemer.com/news_and_events/articles/the_importance_of_hell.html)
Picture the following. I’m sure you’ve seen it before. A homeless drug user, with mental health issues, is walking along the sidewalk talking to himself. No, he’s not talking to himself. He’s talking to someone you can’t see. He’s yelling at him. In fact, he’s fuming and spouting off a bizarre array of cuss words, unintelligible sentences, and repetitive phrases. His skin is red, his hair is uncombed, and his winter jacket contradicts the summer weather.
You might try to talk to him if you were an unusually caring person. It’s of no use. You speak to him, he acknowledges you for a moment, but soon he boomerangs back into his hurricane of resentments and recycled arguments. He’s still arguing with his father who abandoned him 35 years ago.
This picture probably gives us a good glimpse of the rotten, resentful heart and mind of Jesus. It was full of garbage--years of pent up anger and murderous thoughts towards a random variety of family, friends, the government, the system, and many people he didn’t even know. If you’d have met him, you wouldn’t have even sensed he had a soul, but that it had been destroyed, disintegrated, had rotten away, or at least that it was lost somewhere deep down inside of him in a way that no one could ever rejuvinate.
This is my view of what Jesus might have been like during his three days in hell. These are the three days between his death and resurrection when Jesus (God the Son) died on the cross, bore our real sin, and was cast out of his father’s presence (God the Father). God had damned him. Jesus cried out on the cross, “My God, why have you deserted me?” (Matthew 27:46)
And that was it. Complete separation from his own father. His own father abandoned him and left him to his own selfish insanity. No, Jesus had done this himself. Actually, I'm not sure how it works, but as Jesus died, he turned his back on God and walked away. After being separated from His dear, loving father he might have begun to grieve. Shortly thereafter, he might have flip-flopped and hurled insults at God and began an incessant series of arguments with all of the people in his life who had wronged him or looked at him strangely.
Then came deep loneliness, fear, anxiety, and all in one moment he’s back into a fury of disillusions and antagonisms towards his father (God the Father) once again. He might have said something like this, “How did I ever let You convince Me to do this? How dare you Father have manipulated Me into carrying their burdens, their sin, their very lives on my back! They’re horrible, disgusting pieces of trash. They’re unworthy of any help whatsoever and deserve this place more than me. How did I ever let You convince Me to do this for them! You dare call yourself God! You’re like the devil himself. You’re manipulative. You’re detestable. You are a coward. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. How could have I been so stupid!? How could you be so evil? How could you betray me like this Father!? Raise me back to life in three days!? Are you kidding me? Oh God, how could I have been so stupid!? You tricked me! You tricked me! You tricked me! You are no longer my father. Never ever ever ever ever again will I ever call You my father. I will never, ever let myself ever trust you again. This relationship is over! I will never ever ever ever talk to you again. Ever.”
In order to get the full grasp of the judgement Jesus endured for us, I’m speculating that Jesus Himself might have literally lost sight of why He had even died for us or even that it was going to work at all. Of course, I’m only speculating and I don’t have a clue as to the real intensity, but I think He may have broken down into a full-blown case of rage towards His Father. He might have even thought God tricked Him into being cast into hell with no hope of ever being restored. He probably had lost all hope. This is the full weight of judgement.
Now you might be thinking to yourself, "No matter how bad a place hell might be, I'd never turn into anything so crazy as this portrait you are making Jesus out to be during His time away from God the Father." The reality is that we've already been there to a certain extent in our limited lifetime today. Think about someone you've had a mental argument with and it has lasted for days. You've been surprised at yourself for having let it go on so long, but you can't seem to get out of it. It could be as simple as someone cutting you off on the freeway or as hurtful as someone cheating on you. Either way, you retaliate, either in real life or in your own mind. You want to isolate rather than resolve the issue or you get offensive and attack the other person. Hell is an eternal extension of this sort of hell we experience here on earth, minus the presence of God, minus the presence of any loving human beings, plus the addition of it going on for thousands, millions, and billions of years into forever. In fact, it could be you're still arguing with the same driver that cut you off and that was a couple million years ago. When Jesus was rejected by God the Father, he might have went off on millions and billions of all of our arguments, resentments, and furies at at one time. Of course, I can only speculate and I'm treading down uncharted waters, but if I'm theologically incorrect, then I bank on the very hope and rescue that I'm proposing.
Here's the silver lining. On the third day, when He might have been least expecting it, when He was at his most destitute and cynical moment, when He had absolutely no hope, the Father did raise Him from the dead! It was glorious! Having been raised from the pit of hell, everything returned. All the reasons He had trusted the Father. All the reasons He wanted to do it for us. All the reasons He and the Father went in on the deal in the first place.
The silver lining is that Jesus rescued us from this pit of hell. This could be us. This should be us. This is naturally what we gravitate towards--resentment, bitterness, isolation, and separation from God. This is what it is like for those who say “I have no need to be rescued.” In the end, He won’t deny our choice and this will be His conscious choice to both condemn and affirm our personhood all at the same time. He’ll simply let us go our own way. We either let Him rescue us, or we resist any notion of rescue forever.
For those who say, “Yes God, please rescue me!” these people will feel bathed in the deep love and affirmation He has for us. He went into this whole thing knowing full well that He’d turn out to be a shriveled up little piece of junk, wound up in a fetal position, uttering hopeless insults towards the Father or anyone who could hear Him. He knew He’d loose all sense of reality, and this is what He wanted to do for us. This is the silver lining. He’s a Romantic at heart. He’s done it willingly.
Now, there’s a tendency for those who follow Him to have a belief like this, “Oh, yes, I understand He died for my sins and that’s why I need to try my best to keep my act together and be a really good kind of Christian now that I know what He’s really done for me. I better straighten things out. I’m gonna start reading my Bible, I’m gonna start praying and doing devotions every day. I’m gonna prove I really love Him. I’m gonna do this thing now!” This is a bunch of hogwash. I’d use worse terms to describe how awful it is to believe in such a way. It’s a horrible way for a follower of Jesus to live--to deny His rescue which had no regrets.
The opposite of this gotta-make-up-for-what-He’s-done mentality is what’s true. He’s the Great Rescuer. He’s done it willingly. He’s done it without any reservation. When we see the way in which He’s rescued us without any reservations for having done so, we can finally begin to rest.
Let’s remember that this whole non-fiction story of love and romance is about His character, about His love, and about the great lengths that He went to in order to enjoy us forever, so that we could enjoy Him forever. He probably turned into a resentful, insane, and blubbering idiot so that we didn't have to become resentful, insane, and blubbering idiots for eternity. For such a love as this, we should never hesitate.
(I want to thank Tim Keller for some of the theological underpinnings to this blog entry. His article called "The Importance of Hell" can be found at http://www.redeemer.com/news_and_events/articles/the_importance_of_hell.html)
Monday, February 23, 2009
Feeling Awful
If you generally feel awful, then there are a few potential causes. First, you might simply be going through a phase. Second, and more likely, you aren’t spending very much time with other human beings. You’re isolating, and we were designed for human to human contact. Even if you are spending lots of time with other human beings, then potentially you aren’t being vulnerable. Vulnerability means that you invite others into your life who you trust enough to give them permission to help you out with your defects, yet they fully affirm your personhood and decision making. In turn, you reciprocate. Thus, you really get to know each other. You connect. You help each other with what the other can’t do for themself. This is a huge part of what it means to love one another.
Another possibility I can think of, is that you are connecting with with other human beings and you are being vulnerable (or at least open) but you are connecting with the wrong human beings. Maybe they aren’t open and honest with you. Maybe they are, but they’re unwilling to speak into your life. Or, maybe they’re open, but they won’t allow you to help them with their needs. They are trying to play the parent role. Or, maybe they’ve simply shut themselves off from help. A few other possibilities is that they try to manipulate or control you, or they let you control them. They might often try to analyze you and solve your problems. Conversely, they might avoid you. They might not respond to you. Any of these types of people who aren’t willing to deal with their own defects are unsafe people in your life. If you make yourself vulnerable to these types of people, then you will become even worse yourself.
We primarily have to spend time with safe people in our lives. This is the foundation for being able to help unsafe people later. Safe people are those who are in the process of being open and honest, are open to feedback, and are continually dealing with their old ways of relating to people. They have intentionally gotten the help they need from others instead of trying to figure things out on their own, and they are developing new ways of relating to people. They are becoming more of their own persons and making their own healthy decisions. They are open to your help too as you become more safe.
Do well to stay away from unsafe people as your primary source for human to human interaction. They provide no foundation of support for you in your journey. The best way is to be a part of a larger group of safe people that can support each other as unsafe people enter in order to become healthy themselves.
If you are healthy, or in the process of getting healthy, then please do open yourself to a certain extent to be available for those who want a safe person themself. Whatever your situation, I highly recommend the books “Boundaries” and “Safe People” by Cloud and Townsend to help you navigate safe relationships and how to deal with unsafe ones. In fact, don’t listen so much too me, as to those who are tried and tested. I’m on the beginning of this journey myself--generally speaking over the past 3 years and more specifically--over the past 8 months.
In the end, you’ll have to do more than read a book. Take initiative and find a group of people who is living this kind of lifestyle. If you don’t take action, then nothing will ever change.
Another possibility I can think of, is that you are connecting with with other human beings and you are being vulnerable (or at least open) but you are connecting with the wrong human beings. Maybe they aren’t open and honest with you. Maybe they are, but they’re unwilling to speak into your life. Or, maybe they’re open, but they won’t allow you to help them with their needs. They are trying to play the parent role. Or, maybe they’ve simply shut themselves off from help. A few other possibilities is that they try to manipulate or control you, or they let you control them. They might often try to analyze you and solve your problems. Conversely, they might avoid you. They might not respond to you. Any of these types of people who aren’t willing to deal with their own defects are unsafe people in your life. If you make yourself vulnerable to these types of people, then you will become even worse yourself.
We primarily have to spend time with safe people in our lives. This is the foundation for being able to help unsafe people later. Safe people are those who are in the process of being open and honest, are open to feedback, and are continually dealing with their old ways of relating to people. They have intentionally gotten the help they need from others instead of trying to figure things out on their own, and they are developing new ways of relating to people. They are becoming more of their own persons and making their own healthy decisions. They are open to your help too as you become more safe.
Do well to stay away from unsafe people as your primary source for human to human interaction. They provide no foundation of support for you in your journey. The best way is to be a part of a larger group of safe people that can support each other as unsafe people enter in order to become healthy themselves.
If you are healthy, or in the process of getting healthy, then please do open yourself to a certain extent to be available for those who want a safe person themself. Whatever your situation, I highly recommend the books “Boundaries” and “Safe People” by Cloud and Townsend to help you navigate safe relationships and how to deal with unsafe ones. In fact, don’t listen so much too me, as to those who are tried and tested. I’m on the beginning of this journey myself--generally speaking over the past 3 years and more specifically--over the past 8 months.
In the end, you’ll have to do more than read a book. Take initiative and find a group of people who is living this kind of lifestyle. If you don’t take action, then nothing will ever change.
Monday, February 16, 2009
Arrogant Evangelism Explained
Some of you might identify with the following experience. There are people who have or will try to convert you to Christianity and you feel like a project of theirs. They have an agenda and you feel like they are treating you like an object. Their love for you is based upon whether or not you become part of their religious group.
There is another camp which I will call the radical grace camp. These are those of us who declare how good God is, simply because we cannot stop from doing so. Frankly, we don’t care who hears about it or not. We cannot help ourselves. If there was no one to listen, we would still talk about Him because it is too frustrating to hold it in.
I’m sure you can see the difference between these two mindsets. One is focused on changing you and one is focused on declaring how good God is. One tries to get you to “become one of us” and the other offers a “room of grace” where anyone can come and find rest.
Why the arrogant evangelism? The answer is that sometimes, if not often, Christians practice the very thing they preach against. They preach against following the rules as a way to get God’s affirmation. We are simply to trust Him and receive His affirmation. Yet, what happens is we inadvertently turn evangelism back into a rule we have to follow. We believe we can feel better about ourselves and our position before God if we can convince someone to follow Jesus.
I can identify. Even just the other day, I could feel a small, negative emotion of arrogance inside of me while I was talking with a friend about God. I realized that I was subtly trying to convince him of what I believe to be true, so that I could feel good about myself. Subconsciously, I was trying to carve a little notch to show that I’d converted someone. I don’t like it when things like this happen, but it is simply a fact that it did.
From a person who generally feels affirmed by God, you'll feel the difference. You won’t feel like the person is trying to convert you. You’ll feel like they are simply sharing with you about who they are as a person. They will share with you openly about their real sin, about God’s rescue of them, and about the great romance they’ve been taken into. They might even invite you to follow them into this great romance, yet you’ll feel that your personal autonomy has been genuinely affirmed, no matter what you choose. You will feel most comfortable with these kinds of Jesus followers because they will treat you like a person instead of an agenda.
To those of you who follow Jesus, let’s remember to share openly about this great romance since it is too ridiculous not to do so, yet let us affirm the personhood and individual decision making of everyone we meet. God has already done so.
There is another camp which I will call the radical grace camp. These are those of us who declare how good God is, simply because we cannot stop from doing so. Frankly, we don’t care who hears about it or not. We cannot help ourselves. If there was no one to listen, we would still talk about Him because it is too frustrating to hold it in.
I’m sure you can see the difference between these two mindsets. One is focused on changing you and one is focused on declaring how good God is. One tries to get you to “become one of us” and the other offers a “room of grace” where anyone can come and find rest.
Why the arrogant evangelism? The answer is that sometimes, if not often, Christians practice the very thing they preach against. They preach against following the rules as a way to get God’s affirmation. We are simply to trust Him and receive His affirmation. Yet, what happens is we inadvertently turn evangelism back into a rule we have to follow. We believe we can feel better about ourselves and our position before God if we can convince someone to follow Jesus.
I can identify. Even just the other day, I could feel a small, negative emotion of arrogance inside of me while I was talking with a friend about God. I realized that I was subtly trying to convince him of what I believe to be true, so that I could feel good about myself. Subconsciously, I was trying to carve a little notch to show that I’d converted someone. I don’t like it when things like this happen, but it is simply a fact that it did.
From a person who generally feels affirmed by God, you'll feel the difference. You won’t feel like the person is trying to convert you. You’ll feel like they are simply sharing with you about who they are as a person. They will share with you openly about their real sin, about God’s rescue of them, and about the great romance they’ve been taken into. They might even invite you to follow them into this great romance, yet you’ll feel that your personal autonomy has been genuinely affirmed, no matter what you choose. You will feel most comfortable with these kinds of Jesus followers because they will treat you like a person instead of an agenda.
To those of you who follow Jesus, let’s remember to share openly about this great romance since it is too ridiculous not to do so, yet let us affirm the personhood and individual decision making of everyone we meet. God has already done so.
Affirmation
Yesterday was an emotional roller coaster. I felt confused and fearful about a number of things I’m facing in my life. Thankfully, I ran into a friend at church who is aware of some of my current, life struggles. He listened to my thoughts of confusion and simply affirmed me regardless of any decisions I choose to make. He spoke words of freedom to me. In fact, it was like God Himself had spoken these words of freedom to me (1 John 3:20). In one moment, I was dead. The next moment, I was alive.
Let’s remember to affirm one another very often with words of freedom which bring life.*
*I believe that the more affirmed we are over time, the more we become aware of God’s constant affirmation even during the periods of time when we don’t feel anyone’s else’s affirmation. There will never come a time during this life, however, when we can live for too long without the affirmation of other human beings. This is God’s design.
Let’s remember to affirm one another very often with words of freedom which bring life.*
*I believe that the more affirmed we are over time, the more we become aware of God’s constant affirmation even during the periods of time when we don’t feel anyone’s else’s affirmation. There will never come a time during this life, however, when we can live for too long without the affirmation of other human beings. This is God’s design.
Baptize Me (Part Two)
A small church in Tucson, called Vineyard Christian Community, baptized me and my friends in 1994. In doing so, they declared that not only had God cleansed us from all of our sin, but they were doing the same to us as well. They knew we would hurt them in various relationships over time. Yet, they chose not to condemn us and freely welcomed us into the community. They had declared our forgiveness before-the-fact, and were not ashamed to call us brothers and sisters.
There are two primary ways a community of believers baptize each other over time. The first is grace and the second is truth. Jesus came into this world to show us both of them (John 1:14). Grace is total forgiveness and affirmation of each other even if it takes time to do so. I say that I forgive you so that you might live. A community which lacks forgiveness of one another is full of dead people. A community which practices grace is full of life.
Truth is closely related to grace because in truth we confront one another when there is a violation. If you hurt me or the community and I or we fail to confront you on that behavior, then this is a failure to love. We essentially say, “We do not love you enough to help cleanse you from your sin so that you can develop positive, healthy relationships.” In a spirit of truth, we help each other move from self-condemnation and outwardly hurtful behavior to self-affirming and uplifting behavior.
Grace and truth go hand-in-hand. They are both affirming, if done in the right manner. They both fall under the umbrella of love, which is the highest command. Let’s remember that God baptizes us (washes us clean) over time in the midst of a spiritual community, through grace and truth.
There are two primary ways a community of believers baptize each other over time. The first is grace and the second is truth. Jesus came into this world to show us both of them (John 1:14). Grace is total forgiveness and affirmation of each other even if it takes time to do so. I say that I forgive you so that you might live. A community which lacks forgiveness of one another is full of dead people. A community which practices grace is full of life.
Truth is closely related to grace because in truth we confront one another when there is a violation. If you hurt me or the community and I or we fail to confront you on that behavior, then this is a failure to love. We essentially say, “We do not love you enough to help cleanse you from your sin so that you can develop positive, healthy relationships.” In a spirit of truth, we help each other move from self-condemnation and outwardly hurtful behavior to self-affirming and uplifting behavior.
Grace and truth go hand-in-hand. They are both affirming, if done in the right manner. They both fall under the umbrella of love, which is the highest command. Let’s remember that God baptizes us (washes us clean) over time in the midst of a spiritual community, through grace and truth.
Monday, February 9, 2009
Baptize Me
Most of us spend our entire lives trying to wash ourselves clean from sin. This is impossible. In fact, God says that our good works are like filthy, dirty rags (Isaiah 64:6).
This doesn’t mean that we should downplay our good works. In fact, we should shout out about our good works because they demonstrate how wonderful God has made us to be able to do these good works (Matthew 5:16). This is the opposite of pride.
However, when we try to use our good works to keep God and others off our back for the bad things we’ve done, then this is like trying to clean ourselves with rags that are filthy, dirty, and putrid. We wash our filthy skin with the dirty rags of arrogance.
The only way we can get clean is through someone else with clean water who can do the job. Essentially, it is God’s pleasure to wash us clean from our sin through taking it on Himself at the cross. It is like He has washed us with the most fresh and clean water we could ever think of. We become cleaner than clean. Maybe even cleaner than that.
Water baptism is a simple yet profound metaphor showing us what is taking place. When we are baptized, we announce to God and those around us that it is God who is washing us clean. It is His action, not our own.
Let’s remember that He must baptize us and that we cannot baptize ourselves.
This doesn’t mean that we should downplay our good works. In fact, we should shout out about our good works because they demonstrate how wonderful God has made us to be able to do these good works (Matthew 5:16). This is the opposite of pride.
However, when we try to use our good works to keep God and others off our back for the bad things we’ve done, then this is like trying to clean ourselves with rags that are filthy, dirty, and putrid. We wash our filthy skin with the dirty rags of arrogance.
The only way we can get clean is through someone else with clean water who can do the job. Essentially, it is God’s pleasure to wash us clean from our sin through taking it on Himself at the cross. It is like He has washed us with the most fresh and clean water we could ever think of. We become cleaner than clean. Maybe even cleaner than that.
Water baptism is a simple yet profound metaphor showing us what is taking place. When we are baptized, we announce to God and those around us that it is God who is washing us clean. It is His action, not our own.
Let’s remember that He must baptize us and that we cannot baptize ourselves.
Saturday, February 7, 2009
The Power of Small Groups
Hanging out in small groups of people who are spiritually healthy is one of the primary ways we grow as human beings. Growing outside of a small group is almost impossible.
Getting into a group that is filled with grace is step one. After that, the mechanics or logistics aren’t entirely that important, so long as the following are in place: The group shares openly and feels a sense of safety. The group practices the biblical aspects of peacemaking with each other (Matthew 18). The group endorses the personhood of each individual and their decision making. The group has some sort of purpose or direction (what it is isn’t always entirely important).
The main thing is to get into a healthy, grace-filled group. 1 Peter 4 says that when we talk to each other, our words have the potential to be the very life giving words of God to each other. It is like we are connecting with God Himself. This is the power of a small group of healthy Christ followers.* The opposite is isolation, which is the beginning of hell.** Are you in a small group where you feel safe to share and empowered to grow? If not, then personal growth is almost impossible.
*Dr. Henry Cloud & Dr. John Townsend
**This idea comes from C.S. Lewis, Tim Keller, and my own experience. Isolation can also raise its ugly head in the middle of an unhealthy small group. Everyone can be meeting together, but totally isolated from one another. This is also the beginning of hell. Lewis shows both types of isolation in "The Great Divorce".
Getting into a group that is filled with grace is step one. After that, the mechanics or logistics aren’t entirely that important, so long as the following are in place: The group shares openly and feels a sense of safety. The group practices the biblical aspects of peacemaking with each other (Matthew 18). The group endorses the personhood of each individual and their decision making. The group has some sort of purpose or direction (what it is isn’t always entirely important).
The main thing is to get into a healthy, grace-filled group. 1 Peter 4 says that when we talk to each other, our words have the potential to be the very life giving words of God to each other. It is like we are connecting with God Himself. This is the power of a small group of healthy Christ followers.* The opposite is isolation, which is the beginning of hell.** Are you in a small group where you feel safe to share and empowered to grow? If not, then personal growth is almost impossible.
*Dr. Henry Cloud & Dr. John Townsend
**This idea comes from C.S. Lewis, Tim Keller, and my own experience. Isolation can also raise its ugly head in the middle of an unhealthy small group. Everyone can be meeting together, but totally isolated from one another. This is also the beginning of hell. Lewis shows both types of isolation in "The Great Divorce".
Addressing Legalism (Part VII): Miracles, Jealousy, and the Desire for Control
Jesus and His students were hanging out. They said, “Jesus, we tried to stop this guy from driving out demons in your name because he isn’t one of us.” To Jesus, this was ridiculous. “Don’t stop him. Whoever’s not against us is for us” (Mark 9).
Jesus’ students found it less important that this guy was healing people from their demons than the fact that he wasn’t part of their group. That bothered them. They tried to stop him. Can you believe it? They tried to stop someone from healing people! This is the insanity of legalism. Grace says, “Oh, it is so good that this man has healed people from their demons!” The unwritten rules of legalism says, “Why aren’t you with us? What’s wrong with us?”
The root of the problem with Jesus’ students was jealousy and a need to control. I can identify. When I see others doing wonderful ministry who aren’t a part of my group, I sometimes feel this sense of jealousy within my own heart. I have no control over them and this sometimes bothers me. They could be doing great ministry and maybe even better ministry than I am. Moreover, the fact that they’re doing better ministry might be the very thing that’s bothering me.
The only thing that eventually saved Jesus’ students from legalism was their faith in following the perfect non-legalist, who was Jesus. They’d gotten it all wrong. Jesus’ students had a similar mindset as the Teachers of the Law. They were tring to stop this guy from casting out demons (Mark 9) just like the Teachers of the Law had previously tried to stop Jesus from healing people on the Sabbath (Mark 3). The primary difference between the Teachers of the Law and Jesus’ students was that His students followed Him (the grace giver) while the Teachers of the Law rejected Him. His students trusted Him even though they didn’t understand Him.
Eventually, many of Jesus’ students rejected most of their legalism. But, even years later, Paul had to confront Peter for treating Greek followers of Jesus differently from his Jewish brothers who followed Jesus. It was a lengthy process for all of them and still is for us today. We simply need to keep following Jesus, without much worry for what others are doing or saying. If they aren’t against us, then they’re for us. Any other agenda, and we might condemn someone who is healing people from their demons.
Jesus’ students found it less important that this guy was healing people from their demons than the fact that he wasn’t part of their group. That bothered them. They tried to stop him. Can you believe it? They tried to stop someone from healing people! This is the insanity of legalism. Grace says, “Oh, it is so good that this man has healed people from their demons!” The unwritten rules of legalism says, “Why aren’t you with us? What’s wrong with us?”
The root of the problem with Jesus’ students was jealousy and a need to control. I can identify. When I see others doing wonderful ministry who aren’t a part of my group, I sometimes feel this sense of jealousy within my own heart. I have no control over them and this sometimes bothers me. They could be doing great ministry and maybe even better ministry than I am. Moreover, the fact that they’re doing better ministry might be the very thing that’s bothering me.
The only thing that eventually saved Jesus’ students from legalism was their faith in following the perfect non-legalist, who was Jesus. They’d gotten it all wrong. Jesus’ students had a similar mindset as the Teachers of the Law. They were tring to stop this guy from casting out demons (Mark 9) just like the Teachers of the Law had previously tried to stop Jesus from healing people on the Sabbath (Mark 3). The primary difference between the Teachers of the Law and Jesus’ students was that His students followed Him (the grace giver) while the Teachers of the Law rejected Him. His students trusted Him even though they didn’t understand Him.
Eventually, many of Jesus’ students rejected most of their legalism. But, even years later, Paul had to confront Peter for treating Greek followers of Jesus differently from his Jewish brothers who followed Jesus. It was a lengthy process for all of them and still is for us today. We simply need to keep following Jesus, without much worry for what others are doing or saying. If they aren’t against us, then they’re for us. Any other agenda, and we might condemn someone who is healing people from their demons.
Friday, January 30, 2009
Addressing Legalism (Part VI): Jesus Intentionally Killed Legalism
Jesus intentionally killed legalism. He touched unclean people. He hung out with tax collectors and sinners. He talked to women and even let them touch Him. He worked on the Sabbath. He fought for justice and compassion over position and religious power. He directly and openly challenged the pride of the Pharisees. They killed Him.
He knew this would happen. The scripture says that it was because of the joy set before Him that he endured the cross. He bore our real sin and made us clean. Had He never intended to do so, He never would have been born. He never would have healed so many, poured His life into 12 close friends, nor would He have fought so hard for our freedom. The legalists may have inadvertently killed Legalism, but Jesus did it intentionally.
He knew this would happen. The scripture says that it was because of the joy set before Him that he endured the cross. He bore our real sin and made us clean. Had He never intended to do so, He never would have been born. He never would have healed so many, poured His life into 12 close friends, nor would He have fought so hard for our freedom. The legalists may have inadvertently killed Legalism, but Jesus did it intentionally.
Addressing Legalism (Part V): The Legalists Inadvertently Killed Legalism
Jesus was His own person. The Teachers of the Law hated it. They couldn’t stand for a construction worker from Galilee to speak with such confidence about God’s ways. What they really hated was that He never asked them for permission to do so. He simply did it. In the end, they hated Him so much that they killed Him.
Funny thing is that by killing Jesus, they killed their own cause. Following His death and resurrection, Jesus’ followers proclaimed that Jesus had rescued them from their own sin, that He loved them, and that this is why He died for them. Therefore, in following Jesus they didn’t have to try to live up to the crazy standards that the Teachers of the the Law tried to weigh them down with. They were free. Legalism was dead. In killing Jesus, the legalists inadvertently killed legalism.
Funny thing is that by killing Jesus, they killed their own cause. Following His death and resurrection, Jesus’ followers proclaimed that Jesus had rescued them from their own sin, that He loved them, and that this is why He died for them. Therefore, in following Jesus they didn’t have to try to live up to the crazy standards that the Teachers of the the Law tried to weigh them down with. They were free. Legalism was dead. In killing Jesus, the legalists inadvertently killed legalism.
Monday, January 19, 2009
Addressing Legalism (Part IV): My Own Demonizing
When I see someone do a good thing, my first thought (unfortunately) is to evaluate the source. Who are they? Where do they come from? What is their belief system?
If the person is my political opposite, then a flavor of resentment tries to stir up in my soul. I have this small, twisted belief that if someone, who opposes me in a particular worldview, could do something noble, courageous, compassionate, or graceful then maybe my worldview might be wrong. Many of us have felt this twisted flavor of resentment to one degree or another. The more obsessive the person, the stronger the resentment. Rush Limbough or Hillary Clinton could save millions of children from starvation, but the other side of the camp would feel uneasy about it. They’re tax collectors, sinners, prostitutes, Samaritans, or Gentiles. They can’t possibly do something good in God’s eyes.
As followers of Christ, we should never worry about this. Although our default is to reject God, we are also very capable of doing noble and compassionate things. The human person is sacred. Even those who blow God off are capable of such great deeds because they are made in the image of God (Keller). When someone who is politically, religiously, or socially opposite from us does something wonderful, we should commend it as wonderful. It is in God’s eyes.
If the person is my political opposite, then a flavor of resentment tries to stir up in my soul. I have this small, twisted belief that if someone, who opposes me in a particular worldview, could do something noble, courageous, compassionate, or graceful then maybe my worldview might be wrong. Many of us have felt this twisted flavor of resentment to one degree or another. The more obsessive the person, the stronger the resentment. Rush Limbough or Hillary Clinton could save millions of children from starvation, but the other side of the camp would feel uneasy about it. They’re tax collectors, sinners, prostitutes, Samaritans, or Gentiles. They can’t possibly do something good in God’s eyes.
As followers of Christ, we should never worry about this. Although our default is to reject God, we are also very capable of doing noble and compassionate things. The human person is sacred. Even those who blow God off are capable of such great deeds because they are made in the image of God (Keller). When someone who is politically, religiously, or socially opposite from us does something wonderful, we should commend it as wonderful. It is in God’s eyes.
Addressing Legalism (Part III): Turning Healing into a Bad Thing
The Pharisees didn’t like Jesus because He healed someone’s hand on the Sabbath* (Mark 3).
My Western ears think this is ludicrous. The reasoning goes like this: Healing someone of a sickness is a good thing to do in most circumstances. Jesus healed people. Therefore, Jesus did a good thing. A further argument might go like this: Anyone who does a good thing shouldn’t be condemned unless it hurts another person or persons without any warrant for doing so. Jesus did a good thing and didn’t hurt anyone without warrant. Therefore, He shouldn’t be condemned by anyone. Emotionally, most Western minds think how in the world could I be upset with someone who instantly healed a man’s hand? We might further think anyone who heals a person simply with his words is probably a good person.
Their Eastern ears understood the problem. This has to do with world views. The Middle Eastern mindset is used to dealing more with the supernatural. Supernatural events, such as a physical healing, don’t necessarily translate into thinking he is probably a good person, because he healed that guy’s hand. Bad people can work supernatural miracles as well from a Middle Eastern mindset.
The Pharisees thought Jesus was a bad person for the following reasons. They saw Jesus healing people all over the place. In fact, what they saw was a tired man. The biblical accounts seem to suggest that there were times when Jesus had to get away from it all. Crowds almost suffocated him, at times. He would get into a boat and cross the lake. The crowds would run around to the other side to catch up with Him. Our Western minds might think why would healing people with His words, cause Jesus to be tired? Jesus was tired however, because of the long days he spent with people constantly beckoning His time and resources. I’m sure He was a tired man.
The Pharisees saw Jesus working on the Sabbath and probably saw He was tired. In their worldview, anyone who exerts oneself on the Sabbath isn’t a good person because he is violating the Law of God through working on the holy Sabbath day of rest. Because they believed that both good and bad people could work supernatural miracles, their logical conclusion was that Jesus was sinning against God (even though it was an amazing miracle) and should be stopped. Their line of thinking was: If someone works on the Sabbath, then they should be condemned because they are violating the Law of God. Jesus was working on the Sabbath. They thought He should be condemned. Elsewhere, the biblical account is more specific and it says that they thought he was doing these supernatural things under the authority of the Prince of Demons.
Legalists (such as the Pharisees, extreme right-wing Republicans, extreme left-wing Democrats, and arrogant people in general) are prone to demonizing those who do good works. It is the only way they can make a good work into an evil thing. They challenge the source.
Jesus’ response: “The Sabbath was made for people, not people for the Sabbath. So, [I, Jesus am] Lord even of the Sabbath” (Mark 2). He put the focus back on God's glory and His love for His people through the gift of the Sabbath. This opposes a focus on maintaining the Law through keeping the Sabbath at all costs, even healing someone.
*[The Sabbath is the gift of a holy day of rest each week that God has given human beings for their benefit and His glory.]
My Western ears think this is ludicrous. The reasoning goes like this: Healing someone of a sickness is a good thing to do in most circumstances. Jesus healed people. Therefore, Jesus did a good thing. A further argument might go like this: Anyone who does a good thing shouldn’t be condemned unless it hurts another person or persons without any warrant for doing so. Jesus did a good thing and didn’t hurt anyone without warrant. Therefore, He shouldn’t be condemned by anyone. Emotionally, most Western minds think how in the world could I be upset with someone who instantly healed a man’s hand? We might further think anyone who heals a person simply with his words is probably a good person.
Their Eastern ears understood the problem. This has to do with world views. The Middle Eastern mindset is used to dealing more with the supernatural. Supernatural events, such as a physical healing, don’t necessarily translate into thinking he is probably a good person, because he healed that guy’s hand. Bad people can work supernatural miracles as well from a Middle Eastern mindset.
The Pharisees thought Jesus was a bad person for the following reasons. They saw Jesus healing people all over the place. In fact, what they saw was a tired man. The biblical accounts seem to suggest that there were times when Jesus had to get away from it all. Crowds almost suffocated him, at times. He would get into a boat and cross the lake. The crowds would run around to the other side to catch up with Him. Our Western minds might think why would healing people with His words, cause Jesus to be tired? Jesus was tired however, because of the long days he spent with people constantly beckoning His time and resources. I’m sure He was a tired man.
The Pharisees saw Jesus working on the Sabbath and probably saw He was tired. In their worldview, anyone who exerts oneself on the Sabbath isn’t a good person because he is violating the Law of God through working on the holy Sabbath day of rest. Because they believed that both good and bad people could work supernatural miracles, their logical conclusion was that Jesus was sinning against God (even though it was an amazing miracle) and should be stopped. Their line of thinking was: If someone works on the Sabbath, then they should be condemned because they are violating the Law of God. Jesus was working on the Sabbath. They thought He should be condemned. Elsewhere, the biblical account is more specific and it says that they thought he was doing these supernatural things under the authority of the Prince of Demons.
Legalists (such as the Pharisees, extreme right-wing Republicans, extreme left-wing Democrats, and arrogant people in general) are prone to demonizing those who do good works. It is the only way they can make a good work into an evil thing. They challenge the source.
Jesus’ response: “The Sabbath was made for people, not people for the Sabbath. So, [I, Jesus am] Lord even of the Sabbath” (Mark 2). He put the focus back on God's glory and His love for His people through the gift of the Sabbath. This opposes a focus on maintaining the Law through keeping the Sabbath at all costs, even healing someone.
*[The Sabbath is the gift of a holy day of rest each week that God has given human beings for their benefit and His glory.]
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Addressing Legalism (Part II)
Many people try to forge new paths in their lives, but when they do people ask them, “Why do you have to forge a new path? What’s wrong with the status quo?” Legalism says you can’t forge your own, new path. You have to follow our rules, it says. Grace says otherwise.
A long time ago, some people asked Jesus a question. They said, “John’s students and the Pharisees fast. Why don’t your students do the same?” Jesus gave them an answer, but quickly moved on to the real point. He said, “If you pour new wine into old wineskins, then those old wineskins will break. It doesn’t work. New wine has to be poured into new wineskins. They won’t break.” Sometimes, people have to break out and create their own new practices (new wine in new wineskins), contrary to the status quo, even if there isn’t anything wrong with the status quo (for example, John’s students still did fast, like the Pharisees). However, Jesus told his students they didn’t have to fast. Jesus was saying that he has given us permission to pour new wine into new wineskins. (We don't have to adopt the practices of others, even if they question us.)
Here are some examples:
In 1946, Mother Teresa received what she called “the call within the call.” She had a heart for the destitute in India. She left her convent and lived among the poor out of her own sense of autonomy and began her hospice work in 1948. In 1950, she went to the Vatican and received permission to start a new Catholic order. Today the order has 4,000 nuns who work in orphanages, hospices, and other care centers around the world.
Mother Teresa poured new wine into new wineskins. Was there anything wrong with the status quo? Not necessarily. But, Mother Teresa had to become her own person, the one God had created her to be. Do you see that she started first and asked the Pope for permission later?
Tim Keller (a pastor from Manhattan) describes a perfect example of pouring new wine into new wineskins through the marriage relationship. When two people marry, they bring each other’s upbringing with them. Keller describes how he and his wife ran into a problem about changing diapers. In Keller’s childhood, his dad didn’t change the diapers. I think his dad did other things (maybe washing dishes for instance) that his mom didn’t do. So, their idea of sharing was to divide up responsibilities rather than to share each of them. In his wife’s childhood, contrary to Keller’s parents, I believe they tended to share all responsibilities rather than dividing them up. This means they both washed dishes and changed diapers.
One day, Keller’s wife asked him to change the baby’s diaper. Keller said he didn’t plan on changing diapers at all and they got into an argument. In a situation like this one, many of us get into a “right vs. wrong” mentality. This is defective thinking. The reality is that Keller and his wife had to pour new wine into new wineskins. They had to exercise new practices in their new household. They had to be their own married couple, instead of thinking that marriage is reduced simply to what their parents used to do. They had to come up with their own unique set of practices in washing dishes and changing diapers. They had to become their own persons.
In the 70s and 80s, many people left their historic Methodist, Presbyterian, and Baptist churches. They set sail towards new horizons and founded grassroots churches which later became their own denominations. Vineyard and Calvary are notable examples.
I’m sure many people in the historic denominations asked them, “Why do you have to leave? What’s wrong with the status quo? Why do you have to do things differently?” In some cases, they needed to leave because the historic denomination was not theologically grounded, but in other situations, they needed to become their own persons and exercise themselves as their own newly formed congregations. In a sense, they were corporately becoming adults and taking responsibility for the consequences that came with doing so.
Are there things in your life that you want to say yes to or no to, but you’re afraid? You want to tell your boss that you won’t take the extra work. You want to play golf instead of serving food at the soup kitchen this week. You want to try out that new house church. You want to leave a dysfunctional relationship. You want to try out that big dream. You want to leave something lucrative and become a school teacher. You want to start a new ministry. A million voices call your name from every direction. Voices from the past. Opinions of others. False responsibilities that aren’t really yours. This is defective thinking. I’m not saying to be careless.** Weigh in the options of advice from others. The status quo is often a good choice, just make sure it's your choice and not because you're feeling pressured to do so. If you want to, start a new charity in India, create your own new marriage practices, or start a new church structure like Vineyard or Calvary. Jesus has given you permission to pour new wine into new wineskins, if that is the course you would like to take.
[**Some people aren’t psychologically healthy and need a time of healing before they make major decisions. It might be that joining a support group or meeting with a counselor might actually be the big decision they have to make. Their dysfunctional friends might ask them why they even need to take such drastic measures. Why change the status quo? In the end however, a good support group or counselor is only helping them to become more and more autonomous. Through their support the individual will feel empowered to pour new wine into new wineskins when it is the right time. ]
A long time ago, some people asked Jesus a question. They said, “John’s students and the Pharisees fast. Why don’t your students do the same?” Jesus gave them an answer, but quickly moved on to the real point. He said, “If you pour new wine into old wineskins, then those old wineskins will break. It doesn’t work. New wine has to be poured into new wineskins. They won’t break.” Sometimes, people have to break out and create their own new practices (new wine in new wineskins), contrary to the status quo, even if there isn’t anything wrong with the status quo (for example, John’s students still did fast, like the Pharisees). However, Jesus told his students they didn’t have to fast. Jesus was saying that he has given us permission to pour new wine into new wineskins. (We don't have to adopt the practices of others, even if they question us.)
Here are some examples:
In 1946, Mother Teresa received what she called “the call within the call.” She had a heart for the destitute in India. She left her convent and lived among the poor out of her own sense of autonomy and began her hospice work in 1948. In 1950, she went to the Vatican and received permission to start a new Catholic order. Today the order has 4,000 nuns who work in orphanages, hospices, and other care centers around the world.
Mother Teresa poured new wine into new wineskins. Was there anything wrong with the status quo? Not necessarily. But, Mother Teresa had to become her own person, the one God had created her to be. Do you see that she started first and asked the Pope for permission later?
Tim Keller (a pastor from Manhattan) describes a perfect example of pouring new wine into new wineskins through the marriage relationship. When two people marry, they bring each other’s upbringing with them. Keller describes how he and his wife ran into a problem about changing diapers. In Keller’s childhood, his dad didn’t change the diapers. I think his dad did other things (maybe washing dishes for instance) that his mom didn’t do. So, their idea of sharing was to divide up responsibilities rather than to share each of them. In his wife’s childhood, contrary to Keller’s parents, I believe they tended to share all responsibilities rather than dividing them up. This means they both washed dishes and changed diapers.
One day, Keller’s wife asked him to change the baby’s diaper. Keller said he didn’t plan on changing diapers at all and they got into an argument. In a situation like this one, many of us get into a “right vs. wrong” mentality. This is defective thinking. The reality is that Keller and his wife had to pour new wine into new wineskins. They had to exercise new practices in their new household. They had to be their own married couple, instead of thinking that marriage is reduced simply to what their parents used to do. They had to come up with their own unique set of practices in washing dishes and changing diapers. They had to become their own persons.
In the 70s and 80s, many people left their historic Methodist, Presbyterian, and Baptist churches. They set sail towards new horizons and founded grassroots churches which later became their own denominations. Vineyard and Calvary are notable examples.
I’m sure many people in the historic denominations asked them, “Why do you have to leave? What’s wrong with the status quo? Why do you have to do things differently?” In some cases, they needed to leave because the historic denomination was not theologically grounded, but in other situations, they needed to become their own persons and exercise themselves as their own newly formed congregations. In a sense, they were corporately becoming adults and taking responsibility for the consequences that came with doing so.
Are there things in your life that you want to say yes to or no to, but you’re afraid? You want to tell your boss that you won’t take the extra work. You want to play golf instead of serving food at the soup kitchen this week. You want to try out that new house church. You want to leave a dysfunctional relationship. You want to try out that big dream. You want to leave something lucrative and become a school teacher. You want to start a new ministry. A million voices call your name from every direction. Voices from the past. Opinions of others. False responsibilities that aren’t really yours. This is defective thinking. I’m not saying to be careless.** Weigh in the options of advice from others. The status quo is often a good choice, just make sure it's your choice and not because you're feeling pressured to do so. If you want to, start a new charity in India, create your own new marriage practices, or start a new church structure like Vineyard or Calvary. Jesus has given you permission to pour new wine into new wineskins, if that is the course you would like to take.
[**Some people aren’t psychologically healthy and need a time of healing before they make major decisions. It might be that joining a support group or meeting with a counselor might actually be the big decision they have to make. Their dysfunctional friends might ask them why they even need to take such drastic measures. Why change the status quo? In the end however, a good support group or counselor is only helping them to become more and more autonomous. Through their support the individual will feel empowered to pour new wine into new wineskins when it is the right time. ]
Sunday, January 11, 2009
The Silver Lining in the Sermon on the Mount
The Sermon on the Mount (Matthew 5-7) used to bother me because there's no way I can ever live the way Jesus tells us to live. Now, when I read Jesus' Sermon on the Mount, I choose to be happy because these are the things He's willingly saved me from.
Thursday, January 8, 2009
Priorities (Part II)
I don't want to cleanse people from their sin. I want to spend time with them as God cleanses them.
Priorities
I don't want to be cleansed from my sin. I want to spend time with God while he cleanses me.
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
Pig-Pen and Cleanliness
Charles Schulz introduced Pig-Pen as a Peanuts cartoon strip character in 1954. Pig-Pen was the dirtiest kid on the block. A cloud of dust followed him everywhere. A Gallop poll in the year 2000 determined Pig-Pen to be the America’s most lovable Peanuts character. The country loved Him despite his uncleanliness.
Switching gears, let’s talk about the Middle Eastern concept of cleanliness. In Middle Eastern culture, the need to get clean before going to God in prayer is very necessary. Jewish and Muslim traditions require that people abstain from eating pork, abstain from drinking alcohol (for Muslims), dress in certain ways and cut their hair in certain ways (certain Jewish traditions), and they must wash themselves ceremonially before they can enter their center of worship (Muslims). A woman who is in her period cannot enter the Mosque because she is unclean.
The Western, Christian believer is in a similar situation. There are certain cleanliness rules they adhere to as well. Certain extreme traditions (Catholics and certain types of Protestants) require members of the congregation to confess their sins before a priest or pastor before they can take communion. Just like the Muslim and Jewish tradition, this is how many feel they become clean before entering God’s presence. Among evangelicals, lust is the big uncleanliness “no-no”. Millions of teenagers and college students go to youth groups every week and feel ashamed for their sin. They feel like they can’t enter God’s presence if they mentally lusted, made out with a guy or girl the night before, or even had sex. Their youth leaders reinforce their shame by harping on the need to “be pure” and “honor God”. The reality is that most of these youth pastors struggle with the same things themselves and are two-faced. This is outright legalism.
Jesus tells us in John 15:3 that we are already clean because of the word He has spoken to us. I need to check the Greek, but in English the word “already” tells us the action has already taken place. “It is finished.” He tells us in John 20:30. He has already atoned for us. We are already clean. We don’t have to keep trying to wash ourselves clean through our rituals and ceremonies, whether Middle Eastern or Western.
America has more grace for Pig-Pen than it has for human beings. They love him. They think he is lovable. The reality is we all wish we could be like Pig-Pen. We wish we could expose ourselves and that others would accept us. Praise the Lord, there are some groups of people like this where people are growing spiritually through grace. You can find those groups of people, if you try.
With God, we can be like Pig-Pen. We can walk right into His presence with all of our evil deeds exposed. He says to us, “Pig-Pen I’m glad you’re here. You don’t need to be ashamed. The very fact that you are here and that I’m talking with you is what has made you clean. When you came to see Me up on the cross, you saw that I was weak, grief stricken, unclean, and even forsaken by My Father for the sin I bore. It was your sin Pig-Pen. I bore all of it for you and you shouldn’t feel ashamed because I wanted to do this for you. I wanted to make you clean and you are clean because you are here and I have told you so. You don't have to make up for what I've done for you. On the outside, you look dirty (and you are--that’s why they call you Pig-Pen:) but on the inside, where I live inside you, you are the cleanest little guy around. And, that little mustard seed of faith you have will grow and blossom. When you aren’t looking, that is when you might notice that some of the outside has gotten a little cleaner as well. But, don’t worry so much about this.”
Jesus says, “The last shall be first.” In the year 2000, America followed suit and voted Pig-Pen, the least presentable one, their favorite Peanuts cartoon character. In God’s eyes you’re His favorite cartoon character. Walk into His presence. His words of grace makes you clean.
Switching gears, let’s talk about the Middle Eastern concept of cleanliness. In Middle Eastern culture, the need to get clean before going to God in prayer is very necessary. Jewish and Muslim traditions require that people abstain from eating pork, abstain from drinking alcohol (for Muslims), dress in certain ways and cut their hair in certain ways (certain Jewish traditions), and they must wash themselves ceremonially before they can enter their center of worship (Muslims). A woman who is in her period cannot enter the Mosque because she is unclean.
The Western, Christian believer is in a similar situation. There are certain cleanliness rules they adhere to as well. Certain extreme traditions (Catholics and certain types of Protestants) require members of the congregation to confess their sins before a priest or pastor before they can take communion. Just like the Muslim and Jewish tradition, this is how many feel they become clean before entering God’s presence. Among evangelicals, lust is the big uncleanliness “no-no”. Millions of teenagers and college students go to youth groups every week and feel ashamed for their sin. They feel like they can’t enter God’s presence if they mentally lusted, made out with a guy or girl the night before, or even had sex. Their youth leaders reinforce their shame by harping on the need to “be pure” and “honor God”. The reality is that most of these youth pastors struggle with the same things themselves and are two-faced. This is outright legalism.
Jesus tells us in John 15:3 that we are already clean because of the word He has spoken to us. I need to check the Greek, but in English the word “already” tells us the action has already taken place. “It is finished.” He tells us in John 20:30. He has already atoned for us. We are already clean. We don’t have to keep trying to wash ourselves clean through our rituals and ceremonies, whether Middle Eastern or Western.
America has more grace for Pig-Pen than it has for human beings. They love him. They think he is lovable. The reality is we all wish we could be like Pig-Pen. We wish we could expose ourselves and that others would accept us. Praise the Lord, there are some groups of people like this where people are growing spiritually through grace. You can find those groups of people, if you try.
With God, we can be like Pig-Pen. We can walk right into His presence with all of our evil deeds exposed. He says to us, “Pig-Pen I’m glad you’re here. You don’t need to be ashamed. The very fact that you are here and that I’m talking with you is what has made you clean. When you came to see Me up on the cross, you saw that I was weak, grief stricken, unclean, and even forsaken by My Father for the sin I bore. It was your sin Pig-Pen. I bore all of it for you and you shouldn’t feel ashamed because I wanted to do this for you. I wanted to make you clean and you are clean because you are here and I have told you so. You don't have to make up for what I've done for you. On the outside, you look dirty (and you are--that’s why they call you Pig-Pen:) but on the inside, where I live inside you, you are the cleanest little guy around. And, that little mustard seed of faith you have will grow and blossom. When you aren’t looking, that is when you might notice that some of the outside has gotten a little cleaner as well. But, don’t worry so much about this.”
Jesus says, “The last shall be first.” In the year 2000, America followed suit and voted Pig-Pen, the least presentable one, their favorite Peanuts cartoon character. In God’s eyes you’re His favorite cartoon character. Walk into His presence. His words of grace makes you clean.
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
High School and Spiritual Growth (Part Two)
During the first three years of my high school chess career, the wins were sporadic. Great wins. Horrible losses. I was beating myself up because I couldn’t figure out how to get better.
Senior year rolled around and it was my turn to play on what was called “The First Board”. This position called me to play against the other top players from each team around the state. Keeping in mind my sporadic wins, I decided to do a few things: play each game conservatively with a simple plan, and wait for the other player to make a mistake.
I gained a few wins and became more confident. I won the state qualifier and took third at the state high school chess championship. Years later, I realize why I became a more consistent chess player my senior year. Realistically, I hadn’t studied any more books than before, nor had I received any private chess lessons or grown a second brain for a faster processing speed.
The answer is I established a boundary. I told myself there could be no more complicated chess positions, sacrificing of pieces for a possible win, or using openings I didn’t understand. Keep it simple stupid. Play conservatively and wait for the opponent to make a mistake. The result was consistent wins during my senior year.
The spiritual point. Our culture, especially the religious culture, wants us to believe that we should be able to handle each and every situation without a loss. If we can’t, then we better figure out how to increase our abilities and get a win. This is the definition of “spiritual growth” that I’d become accustomed to. The reality is that we all have our limitations and that on many occasions, we simply have to recognize we aren’t good at everything.
Example: "I keep getting in shouting matches with so-in-so at work over our “discussions” about ethics. I go home completely frustrated and feeling guilty. Answer: Don’t hang out in your co-worker's office all the time because you don’t seem able to stay out of your 'discussions'."
Another Example: "I should be able to have lunches out with women at work, even though it’s resulted in a couple of affairs. What’s wrong with me? Why can’t I keep away from doing that? Answer: Don’t eat lunch with them and get some help from a counselor or support group."
A husband-wife example: "I feel guilty and resentful towards my wife because I can never seem to fix our electrical or plumbing problems around the house. I’ve taken the Home Depot classes and everything." Answer: Get an electrician or plumber and save the marriage some anxiety.
These are just a few examples. Let’s remember that in spiritual growth, just like in chess or any other sort of competition for that matter, that sometimes our abilities remain the same. Our true growth lies in how we use the abilities we possess, and setting up boundaries against the things we aren’t good at.
Senior year rolled around and it was my turn to play on what was called “The First Board”. This position called me to play against the other top players from each team around the state. Keeping in mind my sporadic wins, I decided to do a few things: play each game conservatively with a simple plan, and wait for the other player to make a mistake.
I gained a few wins and became more confident. I won the state qualifier and took third at the state high school chess championship. Years later, I realize why I became a more consistent chess player my senior year. Realistically, I hadn’t studied any more books than before, nor had I received any private chess lessons or grown a second brain for a faster processing speed.
The answer is I established a boundary. I told myself there could be no more complicated chess positions, sacrificing of pieces for a possible win, or using openings I didn’t understand. Keep it simple stupid. Play conservatively and wait for the opponent to make a mistake. The result was consistent wins during my senior year.
The spiritual point. Our culture, especially the religious culture, wants us to believe that we should be able to handle each and every situation without a loss. If we can’t, then we better figure out how to increase our abilities and get a win. This is the definition of “spiritual growth” that I’d become accustomed to. The reality is that we all have our limitations and that on many occasions, we simply have to recognize we aren’t good at everything.
Example: "I keep getting in shouting matches with so-in-so at work over our “discussions” about ethics. I go home completely frustrated and feeling guilty. Answer: Don’t hang out in your co-worker's office all the time because you don’t seem able to stay out of your 'discussions'."
Another Example: "I should be able to have lunches out with women at work, even though it’s resulted in a couple of affairs. What’s wrong with me? Why can’t I keep away from doing that? Answer: Don’t eat lunch with them and get some help from a counselor or support group."
A husband-wife example: "I feel guilty and resentful towards my wife because I can never seem to fix our electrical or plumbing problems around the house. I’ve taken the Home Depot classes and everything." Answer: Get an electrician or plumber and save the marriage some anxiety.
These are just a few examples. Let’s remember that in spiritual growth, just like in chess or any other sort of competition for that matter, that sometimes our abilities remain the same. Our true growth lies in how we use the abilities we possess, and setting up boundaries against the things we aren’t good at.
High School Chess and Spiritual Growth (Part One)
My dad taught me chess at a young age. I beat many casual players because I knew the moves and a few strategies. Control the center. Develop the pieces early. Utilize open files and attack isolated pawns. These strategies conquered most opponents.
Later, I began competing in chess tournaments. I played on the high school chess team. It was a great time with my friends Ken, Henry, Vic, Jen, and of course my teacher, Mr. Tallent. It was a fun time.
The first three years were fraught with miserable losses. I’d gain a good position, make a horrible mistake, and then loose the game. I read books about chess, studied the games of others, and practiced every day after school. Still, I kept coming up short.
I’d beat myself up mentally for the sporadic play. What was the problem? Why could I beat the most difficult opponents to find myself the next day, loosing a game with the most mediocre chap? Why couldn’t I figure it out, or get my act together?
The truth is that nothing was wrong. I had entered a level of competition unprecedented in my life. My opponents studied their chess books and played their practice games too. They were good and just as capable of winning as me.
This scenario paints a spiritual picture. Once we decide we really want to turn our lives around and gain spiritual health, it’s like we’ve entered a whole new level of competition. Now we’re competing and playing a spiritual game that’s sporadic. Great wins. Horrible losses. Our temptation is to resign playing at this level of competition, but we must never do so because there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus (Romans 12). We’re gonna lose and it’s okay. We keep playing, and let’s do so because we remember that God thinks we’re more important than our performance.
Later, I began competing in chess tournaments. I played on the high school chess team. It was a great time with my friends Ken, Henry, Vic, Jen, and of course my teacher, Mr. Tallent. It was a fun time.
The first three years were fraught with miserable losses. I’d gain a good position, make a horrible mistake, and then loose the game. I read books about chess, studied the games of others, and practiced every day after school. Still, I kept coming up short.
I’d beat myself up mentally for the sporadic play. What was the problem? Why could I beat the most difficult opponents to find myself the next day, loosing a game with the most mediocre chap? Why couldn’t I figure it out, or get my act together?
The truth is that nothing was wrong. I had entered a level of competition unprecedented in my life. My opponents studied their chess books and played their practice games too. They were good and just as capable of winning as me.
This scenario paints a spiritual picture. Once we decide we really want to turn our lives around and gain spiritual health, it’s like we’ve entered a whole new level of competition. Now we’re competing and playing a spiritual game that’s sporadic. Great wins. Horrible losses. Our temptation is to resign playing at this level of competition, but we must never do so because there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus (Romans 12). We’re gonna lose and it’s okay. We keep playing, and let’s do so because we remember that God thinks we’re more important than our performance.
Friday, December 12, 2008
Addressing Legalism (Part I)
Read the Gospels. See Jesus dismantle legalism. In fact, read the entire Bible. See God dismantle legalism. Legalism is the rules of men and women that take priority over the love and acceptance of God. It disguises itself so that you would think it was discipline or the orderly nature of human affairs. This is a facade. Legalism is always the traditions of men and women that bind other men and women in chains for the purposes of power and control. It wants us to remain passive so that it can move us rather than us taking control of our God-given lives. It’s a string of relationships that can be traced throughout history dating all the way back to the conversation between Eve and the Serpent.
Even before Jesus was born, God ushers Mary and Joseph into addressing their own personal and cultural legalism. Mary had become pregnant through the Holy Spirit. God simply decided Mary would become pregnant with Jesus and it happened. The Matthew account states that Joseph tried to save Mary from public disgrace. He intended to sever their engagement. He probably thought about the consequences of their marriage. A person might ask Mary who the father was and about whether or not Jesus was conceived before their wedding. This presented a problem. If she says Joseph is the father to avoid shame, then this is a lie. If she says that God is Jesus’ father, then people would either think she was crazy or that she was trying to cover up for an adulterous affair. Either answer shames Mary in the eyes of other people.
The concept of shame in Middle Eastern culture is enormous and our Western mindset doesn’t fully understand it. Joseph had decided to quietly sever their engagement because of this potential shaming. It was a somewhat loving thing for him to do, but in an unhealthy way. He was letting legalism direct his actions. God, however, knew what was best for them and would have nothing of Joseph’s falling sway to its influence. God came to Joseph in a dream and told him to maintain the relationship. He is born from the Holy Spirit, God tells Joseph. He will save everyone from their sins and His name is to be Jesus (Matthew 1).
The heaviest potential burden is for Mary. She will probably endure more shame than Joseph. On the other hand, it isn’t an easy situation for Joseph either. In the end, Joseph decided to follow God’s direction. Mary concurs and follows Joseph. My gut feeling is that Mary was thankful for Joseph’s leading, even though they would be swimming against legalistic pressures. From Mary’s perspective, Joseph was supporting the divine nature of her pregnancy and remained her companion. She saw that he loved her. The culture of legalism had tried to encourage Joseph to be passive so it could move him. God moved Joseph towards action so that he could lead him and his wife in their own direction. Let’s remember that God leads us, just like Joseph and Mary, to prioritize love and acceptance over the avoidance of shame and humility in our own lives.
Even before Jesus was born, God ushers Mary and Joseph into addressing their own personal and cultural legalism. Mary had become pregnant through the Holy Spirit. God simply decided Mary would become pregnant with Jesus and it happened. The Matthew account states that Joseph tried to save Mary from public disgrace. He intended to sever their engagement. He probably thought about the consequences of their marriage. A person might ask Mary who the father was and about whether or not Jesus was conceived before their wedding. This presented a problem. If she says Joseph is the father to avoid shame, then this is a lie. If she says that God is Jesus’ father, then people would either think she was crazy or that she was trying to cover up for an adulterous affair. Either answer shames Mary in the eyes of other people.
The concept of shame in Middle Eastern culture is enormous and our Western mindset doesn’t fully understand it. Joseph had decided to quietly sever their engagement because of this potential shaming. It was a somewhat loving thing for him to do, but in an unhealthy way. He was letting legalism direct his actions. God, however, knew what was best for them and would have nothing of Joseph’s falling sway to its influence. God came to Joseph in a dream and told him to maintain the relationship. He is born from the Holy Spirit, God tells Joseph. He will save everyone from their sins and His name is to be Jesus (Matthew 1).
The heaviest potential burden is for Mary. She will probably endure more shame than Joseph. On the other hand, it isn’t an easy situation for Joseph either. In the end, Joseph decided to follow God’s direction. Mary concurs and follows Joseph. My gut feeling is that Mary was thankful for Joseph’s leading, even though they would be swimming against legalistic pressures. From Mary’s perspective, Joseph was supporting the divine nature of her pregnancy and remained her companion. She saw that he loved her. The culture of legalism had tried to encourage Joseph to be passive so it could move him. God moved Joseph towards action so that he could lead him and his wife in their own direction. Let’s remember that God leads us, just like Joseph and Mary, to prioritize love and acceptance over the avoidance of shame and humility in our own lives.
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